creep

i've been thinking about many kinds of stuff lately, it's ben quite a year i went unemployed, freelancer hair styler and employee al aover again in one year, i'm still overwhelmed due the debts i have what i want for next year and the inebitable rumble of trying to have a partner (sometime i think that i try to hard this one), must of the timei end dealing with people that baffle me either i really dont know 
But I'm a creep
I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here
i have not yet found my place and i mean it wherever i go pleople seems like catching everything up a nanosecond faster than me ans is exausting to keep up like speaking another language 
I don't care if it hurts
I want to have control
I want a perfect body
I want a perfect soul
I want you to notice when I'm not around
You're so very special
I wish I was special
im always trying to convince my self really hard that i'm here for a reason (sometimes i'm not sure) sometimes i just ... let go 
But I'm a creep
I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here
trying to find what defines me though i'm not quite sure if it is what i'm looking for is just a feeling that comes along every now and then when i think that normal would be easier than fighting against all odds and stereotypes and prejudism  
She's running out the door
She's running
She runs runs runs runs
Runs

Runs

Whatever makes you happy
Whatever you want
You're so very special
I wish I was special
just being me 
But I'm a creep
I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here
I don't belong here